I’d watched all that Rick Steves had to offer on visiting Rome, and I’d been there once before, so on my second trip, the plan was to hit all the sites that I hadn’t gotten to the first time, cocky as heck with all my knowledge. On my first trip I’d worn blue Keds, and I’d walked an average of 12 miles a day (because … Continue reading Rick Steves Lied to Me
When I first stepped into my apartment, my mouth literally dropped open. I ran to the right, confirming there was a kitchen, then to my left, confirming there was a bathroom. Then I grabbed the scared Building Manager by the collar and shrieked, “GIVE ME THIS GOTDAM APARTMENT!” I had one week left before I had to be out of my old place, and I … Continue reading Van Nuys: The City That Never Sleeps Without a Noise Machine
I miss travel in these dark times, but, it turns out I’ve been cursed with the Pavlovian response of gagging on planes, so maybe it’s best that I can’t fly right now. This gag reflex is going to deeply cramp my style when I’m sitting next to Chris Evans on a flight – both in our “meet cute” and later, en route to our castle … Continue reading I Gag on Planes Now
Oh, boy. Like all of you, 2020 was supposed to be my year. My screenplay had just placed in an awesome competition – which I was promised would bring me fortune and glory – I had just returned to LA from my first Christmas trip home in 5 years, and I was ready to implement all the genius that Dr. Joe Dispenza’s book “Breaking the … Continue reading My Eye Twitch Predicted 2020
I’m only dating men with real jobs from now on. This means: Actors: OUT. Doctors: IN. I’ve watched “The Secret.” I know what I have to do to get what I want in life. Hot Italian Doctor, I’m comin’ for ya. Consider this post my Hot Italian Doctor vision board. I’m a realist, though- Hot Italian Doctor won’t just drop in my lap, problem-free. … Continue reading Seeking: Hot Italian Doctor
Kelly Thinks This 